Tuesday, December 27, 2005
How old will Grace be when she comes home?
When we sent our application to China we requested a 6-12 month old or as young as possible. The youngest we have seen at referral is 6 months old, and we will be traveling about 2 months after referral so the youngest she would be when we bring her home is 8 months. Since Jen and I are on the young side (China requires that you are at least 30 to adopt) we expect that we will get a child that is younger, but that is not guaranteed. There is a rule we read while researching Chinese adoption that if you are over 45 you will be referred a 18 month - 3 year old. But we have seen that doesn't always hold true, most referrals are under 1 year old. They do try to honor parents requests but I think, in general, it comes down to the ages of babies that are available for adoption at the time.
Saturday, December 24, 2005
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
Sunday, December 11, 2005
The simple answer is because that is where our daughter is. Sounds like kind of a smart-ass answer but it is truly how we feel. I think though, when people ask us this question what they are really asking is why did we choose to adopt from China rather than the US, Russia or some other country. When we first started researching adoption we bought a book called "The Unofficial Guide to Adoption". The book basically discussed all of the options available and the pros and cons of each country. It would seem that domestic adoption would be the obvious choice and for some couples it is. For us, though, the main reason that we decided against domestic adoption is because the birth mother or father can change their mind and decide that they want that child back. For us that was a show-stopper. Most of you know that we dealt with infertility issues the past couple years and the loss of having to give up a child that we have had in our house and bonded with was something that we just did not want to deal with. We ruled out Russia because there seems to be some instability and corruption in the adoption program. Many of the Russian children are also affected by Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. We ruled out Korea because the wait is up to two years. We ruled out the South American countries because of some corruption in the adoption programs there. Adopting from China appeals to us because:
- The program has been running for over ten years, thousands of people from the US and abroad adopt from China every year. It is a well traveled, well documented path that we feel minimizes our risks.
- The need is the greatest. There are millions of little girls in China waiting to be adopted.
The children are generally healthy. Very low incidence of fetal alcohol syndrome or HIV
- They will not give us a child that they know to be sick.
- There are great support groups like Families with Children from China that we can get involved with where our daughter can interact with other children adopted from China.
China has such an interesting history and culture. We look forward to traveling there and learning more about it.
- The Boston area has some great resources to teach Grace about her culture. From Chinatown in Boston to all of the museums in the area that have great exhibits on China. We look forward exploring these places with Grace as she grows up so she keeps a connection with her Chinese heritage.
This doesn't mean that adopting from China is without risk. We will be dealing with and traveling to a communist country that can change the rules or close down its adoption program at any time. There is also been recent news about bird flu that concerns us a bit (I will post a question and answer about this at some point in the future). Overall though, adopting from China just seems right for us. We know the risks and are ready to deal with them.