Christmas and CCAA stuff

Jen and I are both on vacation this week, we were hoping to go on a little skiing trip but there isn't any snow anywhere in New England. So we are just taking the time to relax. We did send a letter out to the USCIS today as our fingerprints are about to expire and we will need to be re-printed. Hopefully we will hear from them within the next few weeks so we can get that taken care of. We had a nice quiet Christmas, spent time with family, pretty low key. Grace got a few presents as well. Grammy and Grandpa got her a snowsuit. Uncle Stephen, Aunt Maura and the girls got her an Asian Cabbage Patch Newborn. And Grandma King got her a piggy bank.



I found something really cool this morning as well, Love Without Boundaries has some pictures of the CCAA's new building. One of the pictures is of a shelf of all of the waiting dossiers. We assume that our dossier is on that shelf somewhere. This is about as close as we are going to get to getting an ultrasound pic. I have been wanting to make a donation to this organization and a note on the page asks for a donation if you use the pics. They do some great work in China so we made a donation and here is the pic.

New CCAA Rules

A few weeks ago the Chinese adoption community was buzzing about a meeting that the China Center of Adoption Affairs had regarding new rules for adoptive parents. The reported details of the meeting were that as of May 1st 2007 China will no longer accept applications to place children with parents who:

• Are Single
• Have been married less than 2 years
• Have a BMI over 40
• Are under 30 or over 50
• Have been divorced more than 2 times
• Have been treated for infectious disease, depression or anxiety
• Have net assets under $80,000
• Do not have at least a high school education
• And a few other random things

Fortunately Jen and I would not be affected by any of the new restrictions and since we have already sent our application to China it is expected that we would be grandfathered in even if we fell into the above restrictions. There are a lot of people though that were hoping to adopt in the coming year and will no longer be able to because of the new rules. Also many couples who have already adopted once from China will now not be able to go back to adopt a mei mei (little sister). The odd thing is that the CCAA has not officially released a statement about these new restrictions. Because nothing official has been released and some of the restrictions are open to interpretation there seems to be some confusion regarding some of the restrictions. Some agencies are posting/reporting the restrictions as fact but the details are being interpreted differently by each agency. We haven't heard anything from our agency about the new rules, which is good. I think they are waiting until something official comes out rather than speculate. This week the media picked up on the new restrictions and there were articles in most of the major papers including this one in the Boston Globe. Hopefully something official will be released soon so we all know for sure what these new restrictions will be.
The next batch of referrals should be coming out soon as well. There were rumors that they would be here before Christmas, another rumor that they would be here after Christmas and yet another rumor that they will not be here until next year. One of the rumors has to be right but s usual nobody has any idea when.

Jen finished up her Christmas shopping a few weeks ago and I as usual haven't started yet. We are planning a low key Christmas this year, we didn't decorate the house or put up a tree. We are just planning to visit with family and save the big celebrations for when we have Grace home. Jen and I did buy each other a special gift for Christmas though, we have a vacation in Jamaica to look forward to in February.

11 Month as Christmas Cards

We were hoping this would finally be the year where we could send out Christmas cards with a family picture including Grace. Instead we have to settle for this:

We usually keep the door to the nursery closed so when Lucy gets a chance to go in there she has to investigate everything. I guess she decided that the changing table was for her. Today is also kind of a milestone for us as it is 11 months since our Log in Date. Sometimes it feels like the past 11 months has flown by which gives us some hope that the remaining months will go by just as fast.

CCAA December Update

The China Center for Adoption Affairs website was updated late last week that they have finished placement of children with families have log in dates up to September 8, 2006. That is fourteen days worth of Log in Dates which seems to be about the average they have been referring the past few months. Based on an current average of about 15 days of LIDs referred per month, this would put us at getting our referral sometime this summer. But we really hate to set our expectations based on current averages because as we have seen so much can change month to month. For anyone who happened to see Jen's parent's 50th Anniversary announcement in the Lowell Sun this weekend, it was a misprint that we recently adopted Grace. It was supposed to read that we are waiting to adopt Grace.

Happy Thanksgiving

Hope everyone had a nice Thanksgiving, we spent the Holiday with family. It was an unseasonably warm weekend here and we used the time to get some much needed yard cleanup done. I know I haven't updated this site in a while but there really hasn't been a whole lot going on related to the adoption. Rumors are starting to pick up that the next batch of referrals should be coming in this week. There is also another rumor floating around that I refuse to repeat that would be really positive news but we don't want to get our hopes up only to be disappointed.

CCAA November Update

We got some more good news yesterday. The CCAA website was updated that they have finished review of dossiers logged in before January 31, 2006. This means someone in China has finally looked at our dossier and deemed us OK to adopt. We have heard that sometimes they have questions about a medical issue, income, or criminal history and may ask for additional information or even reject you. I can't imagine waiting all this time to get rejected. We weren't really concerned that they would find anything but it is still a relief to have made it through and to check something off our list. Here's the update:

Some Progress

The last couple week have been kind of rough for us and all of the rest of the waiting families in the world of Chinese Adoption. Even though we are months away from getting a referral we are always anxious each month to see how far they have gotten as it gives is a sense of getting a little closer to Grace. We were expecting the October batch of referrals to arrive a few weeks ago and have been stalking the CCAA website for an update. The rumors have been all over the place regarding how many days this batch was going to cover, these rumor sites can really drive you mad, but is so hard not to look at the rumors. On Tuesday our agency sent out their monthly email that usually says that they have received referrals, but this time it said that they had not received them yet, and they didn't know when they would be coming or how many Log In Dates would be included. So after that email we were feeling pretty down. This morning though things got a little brighter, the CCAA website was updated and it says that they have finished placement of children with families registered before August 25, 2005. This is 16 days worth of referral which is two less days than last month but it is actually good news because August 24th had many, many families logged in so this was a little bit of a speed up. Still not sure why referrals were so late arriving but our agency tells us this is pretty normal, there is a chance that the next batch could arrive before the end of November so it is not really like they skipped the October batch. Still no update regarding January making it out of the review room though, probably will need to wait until the end of this month to check that off our list. We also found out this week that our Home Study Update is complete and has been received by our agency. Our next step is getting our fingerprints and USCIS background checks redone, although we don't have to start that process until January 2007.

Homestudy Update and Other Stuff

This past week we sent out all of our documents for our homestudy update. In a couple weeks we should get our updated homestudy back from our social worker that we will need to bring with us to China. Referrals should be coming this week, rumors are that they will cover through the August 23rd. This would be 13 days of referrals which is less than last month but not really surprising as the 24th is understood to have many families logged in on this day. I think we have resigned ourselves that a speed up is not going to happen. Today Jen went out for lunch in Boston at PF Changs with some of the women from our DTC group. They had a little baby shower for each other and had some good food. Jen came home raving about the food and I was a little jealous so we are going to have to take a trip there after work sometime soon. While Jen was out shopping for a baby shower present she saw this:


She just had to get it for Gracie. I didn't even realize that they still made them. I always thought these dolls were kind of ugly but Jen loved hers and still has it I think so I am sure Gracie will love it as well.

Full Weekend

Jen and I are a bit tired tonight, we had a crash course in childcare this weekend. Jen's brother and his wife planned a night away so we took their three girls (ages 2, 5 and 9) for the weekend. The kids were really well behaved but it was quite a shock for us to go from no kids to 3. We started our weekend with them yesterday around noon when the kids were dropped off. We took off to a local farm to check out the animals and go for a hayride. Interestingly, while we were there we saw four FCCs, this is Jen and my codeword for when we see a family with children from China (we usually stare at them and sometimes follow them around but never get up the nerve to say hello). We picked up some pumpkins for the kids and then it was time to head over to church. Church was interesting. There was an elderly gentleman behind us who kept making random comments and I guess assumed we were a family because as we were leaving he told me I must really have my hands full with four women in my life. I didn't really feel like explaining to him that we weren't their parents so I just kind of laughed uncomfortably and left. I guess it is a pretty easy mistake to make as the kids do look a bit like Jen. But his comment got me thinking about how our family will be perceived once we get Grace home. Because we were all the same race and looked alike the guy assumed we were a family. But I think most people wouldn't even think twice or comment about it. Grace will not look like either of us, we are going to have to get used to people looking at our family and wondering what our deal is, asking questions and making comments. Some of these comments I am sure we will perceive as rude. The church experience made it really hit home that we will probably never be able to blend in as most families do. Not that it is necessarily a bad thing just something we will need to be prepared for and get used to. After Church we picked up some Chinese food and watched Herbie Fully Loaded on DVD. We put the kids to bed around 9:30 and we crashed pretty soon after. The youngest woke up a few times crying probably because she didn't know where she was. I woke up every time, I think Jen slept right through, a sign of things to come? They woke up around 7 and Jen went down to put Nickelodeon on TV for them, I went out to get donuts. After breakfast I needed to entertain them while Jen got ready. We played a game they called "Get scared by Uncle Steve". Since we don't have kids we don't have any masks, toys or props but I improvised with blankets and what I could find, you can make a pretty scary monster with a laundry basket and an old sheet. They left this afternoon and we crashed and watched the Patriots game. It was a fun weekend for us, our cat Lucy, on the other hand, was not impressed. She spent most of her time in the basement and would just meow when she saw me as if to say, "get them out of here". There was a little incident this morning as well where she bit one of the kids, no damage, blood or tears so all was well. I think it was good for her though, she is going to have to get used having a little one around eventually.

9 Months

Today marks 9 months since our dossier was logged in at the China Center for Adoption Affairs. As tough as it the wait has been, what makes it so much more difficult is that we have no idea how much longer the wait will be. When our friends and family ask us how much longer, all we can say is "we don't know". Realistically I think we probably have another year to wait. I hope I am wrong but we just can't get our hopes up that things are going to speed up only to be disappointed when they don't. Along with the longer wait comes the expiration of some of our forms. We finished our home study last November and it is only valid for one year so we need to get that updated. I think all that means is a visit by our social worker to ensure that nothing has changed in our lives, have our criminal background checks redone and pay a fee. We will probably be calling to get that process started next week. Hopefully we don't need to have all of our forms redone and notarized as well.

CCAA September Update

The China Center of Adoption Affairs (CCAA) updated their website last night that they have finished placement of children with families registered before August 9th. That is 18 days worth of referrals which is twice as much as they did last month. Although, most of the rumor sites are saying that the beginning of August had very few registered log in dates so this may not be a sign that things are speeding up. They still have to get through 5 months of Log in Dates to get to us but it is significant progress so we are excited. Haven't heard anything from our agency yet whether they received any referrals this month but we should hear from them within the next couple days. The other part of the CCAA website update says that they have finished reviewing applications registered in December 2005. Since we were registered in January they should be reviewing our application now. Kind of odd to think that someone in China could be looking at our application as I write this.

Bathroom Remodel

We finally got around to taking some pics of our bathroom remodel.....

Before

After

We are pretty happy with the way it come out. It was definitely in need of an upgrade from the bad 80s decor. Jen is trying to talk me into buying an LCD screen to mount on the wall so she can watch Oprah and have a bath. I guess Gracie could also use it to watch cartoons while she is taking a tubbie. We'll see. Not a whole lot of rumors on this month's upcoming batch of referrals. We are not sure what to expect based on last month's small batch. But still hopeful that things will start speeding up. We should know for sure late this week or early next week.

Football

We took off this past weekend to visit Jen's family and take in some college football. The home team won and the weather was great so everyone was happy. I feel like it wouldn't be appropriate not to say something today on the 5 year anniversary of September 11th. We always feel pretty patriotic when we are down in the Washington area but to see all of these brave young men and women preparing to stand up and defend our country really humbles me. All I can really say is Thank You..
Nothing really going on in adoption news, Jen and I did finish up our Hepatitis vaccinations last week, so I guess that is one less thing we have to worry about. Our bathroom remodel is finally finished as well. We just need to touch up some paint and hang a couple things on the walls and we are back to normal.

8 Months

Tomorrow marks 8 months since our Log In Date. Some days is seems like the time has gone by pretty fast and some days it feels like we have been waiting forever. It has definitely been like a roller coaster ride. I spend a lot of time reading other waiting families' websites and blogs as it is nice to get some perspective from people that are in the same boat as we are. Have noticed recently that morale seems to be pretty low with many waiting families. The common theme seems to be that we just have no idea how long the wait is going to be. A few families just can't deal with it and are switching to domestic adoption or other countries. This is not something Jen and I have ever considered, we wish we knew how long the wait is going to be but we don't and we know our daughter is in China. We attended a wedding this past weekend for saw many of my family members who excitedly asked us if there was anything new with the adoption. It was tough to have to say again and again, no, nothing, no idea when we will know. It is nice to see people genuinely excited for us but at the same time it is difficult to tell people that we have no idea when Grace will be coming home. To give us just a nibble of good news the China Center of Adoption Affairs updated their website last week that they have finished review of adoption applications registered in their office before November 30th 2005. So this means that they are now working on December and since we are logged in January we should be next. I read somewhere that they actually work on two months at a time so they could actually be reviewing out application now. From what I understand the review process is just to make sure all of your documents are in order and you meet all of the requirements. Sometimes people will get a call requesting additional information, we have our fingers crossed that we will make it through OK. I think we will breathe a little easier when the website reads that they have finished reviewing applications registered in January. See the latest screen shot below.

August Referrals

This month's batch of referrals arrived at our agency yesterday, they had only 4 referrals in this batch with log in dates of July 14th 2005. We have heard that this batch had referrals up to July 22nd but our agency didn't have any LIDs between the 15th and the 22nd. Unfortunately this is only 9 days worth of referrals. Last month they did 15 days which was a few more days than the previous month so it looked like the trend was to refer a couple more days each month. Now we are not sure what to think, probably just a coincidence that they were referring more days each month. The pattern of the referrals coming in was a little different this month as well. Usually around mid month rumors start flying around, some good, some bad, and by the end of the month someone in the know will leak how many days will be referred for the month, then referrals arrive a few days later. This month there weren't really any rumors except that referrals would be coming out next week or early September and then on Thursday people started reporting that they were getting referrals. Not sure what to make of this, maybe the Chinese Center of Adoption Affairs is getting a little more strict with the information that they release. Probably a good thing as these rumors can drive a person crazy. We have heard that August is a light month so as long as they can get through the rest of July next month August should go pretty fast, we hope.

Jen starts back up at school next week, when we started the adoption process we were thinking that we would probably have the baby by now and she would take some time off, now it looks like she will most likely be working the full school year based on how referrals have slowed down. I guess this just means that we can take our 5th last childless vacation this winter. Something to look forward to. We are still not completely done with out bathroom remodel. The tub and toilet are installed but still no sink. At least we have a partially functioning bathroom now. The sink should be installed next week. We also realized that we need to get the electrician back in to move a light fixture. We bought a new medicine cabinet/mirror and it is shaped a little differently from our old one. I can only see half of my face when I look into it and I am not very tall. So we need to move it up about 6 inches but there is a light fixture above it so we need to get that moved first. We did take the new whirlpool tub for a test-drive this week, very relaxing, definitely a good investment.

5 Year Anniversary

Yesterday Jen and I celebrated our 5 Year Anniversary. We went out to dinner to celebrate and spent a ridiculous amount of money dining at a local restaurant called Silks at Stonehedge Inn. We have been there a couple times and the food and wine is always great. The first time we went we had only been dating a few years and it was our first time in a fancy restaurant. We were so out of our element, funny how much we have changed since then. Someone once told me that life never really turns out how you expect it to. If you would have asked us on our wedding day where we thought we would be in five years, I guarantee we would not have said we would be preparing to travel to China to adopt a baby. I expect we would have said happily married with a couple kids. We are happily married, we are just going about having the kids a little differently than most. We are still working on getting the nursery set up. Our current project is cleaning out the closet. Right now it is being used as Jen's seasonal closet and various other storage, so we needed to get some more closet space. So off we went to IKEA and bought a new wardrobe. We needed some bookcases as well so I took a couple vacation days this week and have been putting together furniture for the past couple days. This prompted us to clean and organize our basement which is a good thing as we hope to use it as a playroom for Gracie.

I wish I had a before pic but this is how it looks now.

This is the other, unorganized side of our basement, where we are storing some of the big boxed baby items.

We are hoping to get everything done this weekend, need to go to Babies-R-Us as the mattress is on sale, which we think is the last big item we need to get. We expected referrals to come this week but they didn't. Looks like they will be coming early next week and will cover Log In Dates through July 13th as was rumored. Although this isn't official yet, the China Center for Adoption Affairs website hasn't been updated and we haven't heard anything from our agency.

Working on the Nursery

We finally have sorted through most of the shower gifts and have them pretty much organized. We have been working on putting the nursery together now that we have stuff to put in there. I will post some pictures when it is complete. We need to get a few more things but are waiting for them to go on sale. The difficulty now is having to look at a completed nursery everyday and we have no baby in there and no real idea of when we will get her. We may need to keep the door closed for a while so that we don't have to see it every day. The next batch of referrals should be coming out this week. There have been rumors that the China Center for Adoption Affairs building is moving and that could delay referrals a bit. The rumors also seem to be saying that this referral group will cover people with Log In dates up to July 13th. This would be 15 days which is 2 more days than last month but unfortunately not a full month as some people in the adoption community were expecting. So our best case scenario of getting our referral in January 2007 is probably not going to happen. We are now looking at getting our referral sometime between February 2007 and July 2007.

Baby Shower

This was a pretty busy weekend for us. On Friday we had a 50th Anniversary party for Jen's parents. Lots of family were up for the party and we had a really good time. Yesterday, Jen had a baby shower. It was so nice to have so many friends and family supporting us with the adoption. We got so many nice gifts, Grace is definitely not going to go without anything. We are still trying to sort through everything and probably will for the next couple of weeks. Today we went to Babies R Us and used some of the gift cards that we got on some of the registry items that were not purchased. I have enough toys and furniture to put together to keep me busy for months. Some pictures from the shower below. We'll post some more as we get them.

CAWLI Picnic

We had a fun day yesterday. We attended a picnic hosted by some families from our adoption agency. There were about 20 families there with children adopted from China as well as quite a few waiting families like us. It was nice to see so many happy families, some with more than one baby from China. We also got to meet a couple more families from our DTC group who we will probably be traveling to China with. We are now a year in since we started the adoption process last summer. It has gone by pretty fast. We hope that the remaining wait time goes just as fast. Hope everyone has a great holiday weekend.

CCAA June Update

The image below is a screenshot I took of the China Center for Adoption Affairs website as of Thursday. They have finished placement of children registered before June 28th. This means that they got through thirteen days of referrals this month. It is good news that they are processing a few more days each month. Although the wait now is at the 1 year point, in order for us to get our referral in January (1 year) they would need to start processing full months of referrals from this point forward. Not sure how likely that is but there are rumors that May and June 2005 were really heavy LID months and July and August are much lighter. I guess we wait and see. Our agency hasn't received the referrals yet, probably will early next week. The other part of the CCAA website update is that they have finished review of applications that they received before October 31st. They got ours in January so we are about two months away from the review room. Once it gets to the review room it is checked over to ensure everything is in order and sometimes they will request additional information from us. Apparently our application has been just sitting in some office in China for the past 6 months, nobody has even looked at it yet. Jen finished school this week so she is happy to be on her summer vacation. We don't have any big vacation plans for this summer as I am trying to save my vacation time for the trip to China and then take a couple weeks off afterward. We are planning to do a little remodeling on our upstairs bathroom this summer. We aren't doing it ourselves though, just hiring someone to replace the tub, fixtures and retiling. This will be the first major work we are having done to our house so it should be interesting.